Funny words with a screen reader

I use Apple’s Voiceover screen reader, a less common one, as it seems that most people I meet use Jaws or other Windows readers. I’ve blogged before about what I consider to be great benefits of Apple when it comes to money. If you click the Voiceover tag, you should find it somewhere.

I don’t have a lot of comparison to Windows readers, other than the way my phone sounds, and it just doesn’t compare.

One of the best things about Alex, VO’s latest voice, is that Apple made him sound as human as possible. He actually breathes at natural pauses! In my months of listening to Alex, I’ve discovered some favorite words, words he pronounces perfectly, that are actually really cool and funny at the same time.

Examples of fun words he says perfectly:




And of course I’m going to blank now. With those three words, he sounds just like a human, and just like a frenchman saying croissant hehe!

I love the way he says meow. He has an inflection that is just too cute. I actually have him saying the following when my computer starts:

“Meow meow meow kitty wants a croissant!”

Yes, I’m a dork.

I’ve corrected some words that I didn’t like how he said. Like, a lower case “lol” sounded like “lull”. So I taught him how to just say lol like he did in all caps.

Man, I can’t think of the other words I corrected. Mostly last names. He said a lot of my friends’ last names wrong, including mine. He also said my Mom’s name wrong, and a few other first names.

I had to correct him in saying sighties, because he used to say “sight ties”. A few others in that vane I have corrected, like “hottie” so it didn’t sound like “hot tie”.

Every so often, words are suddenly pronounced differently after an update. Apple must get emails or something, because they’ll correct words.

For the longest time when I typed “wassup”, it sounded like WAH sup. Then suddenly, “wassup” sounded like the cool guy on the corner saying “wassup” to a pretty girl hehe!

Oh, and the laughing. Haha or hehe sounds perfectly fine. But when its multiple ha’s or he’s its hilarious, almost maniacal.

It’s really funny if I do this:

Hahahaha haha hahahaha heheheheheheheheehahahaha heheh hahaha ha, ha, ha, he, ha, he, ha, ha ha ha ahahahahahahahahehehehe.

Oh and all the smilies sound different too. A colon and right or left parenthesis just gets a “smilie” or “frown”, a semi colon and right parenthesis get a “wink”. But an equals sign and a D just sounds like, equals D. Or an equals sign and a right parenthesis just gets an “equals”. He doesn’t say “right parenthesis.

For awhile, people would do a colon and an O. And I just thought they were writing, Oh!

Teeeeeeee heeeeeee heeeeeee sounds like tee hee wee. I don’t know why its interpreted that way lol.

Or “awwwwwwwwwwwwww” sounds like “oh woo”.

Of course I’ve played around with swear words, and my friends get the biggest kick out of those lol!

Oh and its especially funny when I’m chatting. For some reason in Yahoo, in the text edit field when I’m typing, I don’t have my key echo, so I don’t hear myself type. Sometimes I’m on the wrong keys without realizing, so I send the message and hear something like:

U dudb;t reakuze U was ib tge wribg heys

I just typed “I didn’t realize I was on the wrong keys” with my right pointer on the H instead of the J.

I kinda wanted to kill some time but didn’t want to write about anything serious. In a reply to another blogger, I shared some words and thought it would make a fun post.

Screen reader users, what are some of your favorite words?

Oh, and be careful, if you typo your name and it sounds funny, I will forever call you that. Just ask JayNoi 😉


Filed under apple Inc, assistive technologies, Jaws, proud geek, quirky words, random stuff, screen reader, silly girl, Voiceover

10 Responses to Funny words with a screen reader

  1. Ha ha ha, this whole post made me giggle. I downloaded a demo of Jaws to my computer once and played around with it. I loved how it pronounced things. It made me laugh. I don’t remember exactly what it said because it was a while ago. But I wanted to see what Jaws was and how it worked. I was really confused trying to get it working but it sure cracked me up once I did. 😀 Meow, meow. ha ha

  2. lol
    I was reading and thought to myself,”Could you get Alex to fix Jnoi? And the very last line you say…”Just ask JayNoi”

    Love your sense of humor!
    Croissant anyone?

    Jnoi 😛 (does it stick out its tongue at you?) lol

  3. R

    Megan, I can’t wait to play around with Jaws some day. Thats awesome that you downloaded the free trial to try it out. I’ve had Apple users discover they can turn on Alex and run to go play with it hehe!

    JayNoi, Shh only works with just 2 h’s. Multiple h’s just sound like “s-h-h-h-h-h” lol!

    Oh and :p just gets a “p” but I know its a tongue tee hee!!!

  4. It’s so funny. We all play with swearing when we get a new voice. I remember one day I brought my language master, it’s a talking dictionary, to school when I lived at W. Ross Macdonald school for the blind. I left my room, and I came back, and all I heard was “working…definition.” and then a big giggle. I looked at my room-mates and asked them which dirty word they were looking up. Then said don’t worry. I did it too.

  5. Well, Glen certainly enjoyed your post. I’ve never heard him laugh so hard!

  6. R

    Karen, whats that gadget? Sounds cool!

    S, is Glenn the name of your computer voice? Glad I made him laugh 😉

  7. Now I’m jealous! I want a named guy who talks dirty to me. Oops did I just say that? I meant, I want a glen and an Alex and any other tech guy to say funny words. oh nevermind..I have a Stormcrow.

    shh maybe he won’t read this.

    Thanks for the smile.

    jnoi *wink*

  8. L^2

    That’s so funny!

    I haven’t used a screen reader in a long time, but I should probably look into getting one sometime. The last time I used one it sounded so terribly robotic that I found it more annoying than helpful. I’m really glad to hear that they sound more human now.

    I just found out recently that screen readers apparently don’t know scientific notation so they read my screen name as L hat 2 instead of how it should be pronounced: L Squared. And that really made me giggle.

  9. R

    JayNoi you naughty girl!!!! And you got shhh down pat tee hee!

    L, Maybe I should call you Carrot. Alex says your name “L carrot 2” hehehe! Luckily my old science days kicked in and I knew you meant L Squared. But since I’m nicknaming people….hmmmmm…..

    Seriously though, look into Apple. With your photography, it’d be great. And the accessibility features are really great, in my opinion.

  10. Well I did discover and they have a voice that will say the word. And I DO NOT put in naughty words!:P I just like the inflections they put on the letter p or t p-u-t. Simple words sound hilarious. *smile*

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