Oh, I’m just a bundle of emotions today. I’m sure there are a lot of factors here, like bad weather all week which leads to bad spoon days, to Aunt Flo not being able to make up her mind when to visit, to the crazy insane warnings we had here last night which led to anxiety and feeling horribly tense which made me wish I could have a drink or twelve to calm my nerves. So it would be expected that I should be feeling pretty raw today haha!
I have to say though, it was really cool last night. I was talking to my friend Erik online, the one I’ve been online frinds with for like 12 years. He’s been trying to help a friend get sober and often asks me questions or just needs to talk to clear his mind. He’s a total normie, watching his friend free fall into his addiction. Well, his friend is finally starting to grasp some hope. So last night I confessed to Erik that I had the urge to drink a few and he said, “My friend had the urge a few days ago and he said the serenity prayer really helped.” Ah! I had forgotten to utilize the serenity prayer. So I told him to tell his friend he just helped me. Sweet.
So on to today. Dave cancelled our lesson due to weather for the first time. I answered the phone and he said, “unless you have flippers, we’re not going out today.” I was kinda disappointed, but relieved at the same time since I’ve felt so lousy this week. I asked if he thought we could do anything inside and he said I had nothing left to learn, that all we need to do is continue to review intersections. So he’ll try and fit me in early in the week if he has a cancellation. And here I was all ready to fill my pockets with Reece’s Peanut Buter cups to reward Juno Dave hahaha!
So I was getting caught up on email and stuff and someone had posted a link to a bunch of audio and video on the GDB website so I checked it out. Enter the water works. I think it’s a raiser who loses it at a graduation and I lost it too. Then they talked with a puppy raiser and I lost it. Then just all the cool interviews and stuff and my heart got so full it burst. I remembered my Mom saying that when she had me, she cried and just kept saying “I don’t have to give her back…”. She had held so many babies and had to give them back, but I was hers. I’ve only met 2 guide dogs, and it was so brief, and they weren’t mine, and I fell in love with them. So I just started thinking about when I get mine, I won’t have to give her back. I keep thinking about dog day and I hope I don’t crush her with my embrace hehe!
Oh, if you’re interested, here is the link to the videos and audio. If the sounds of dogs and such is an emotional sound for you, be prepared.
Wow, typing this is making my arms ache, so I think I’ll wrap up and get back to the couch.
24 days! That’s only 3 weeks! What!? How did that happen???