Doggy Countdown – Bittersweet

I can’t seem to stop crying, so we’ll see if I get through this post. Nothing bad has happened, don’t worry.

I got all ready for my last lesson with Dave this morning. Timmy was meowing a lot, so I got audio of it. I think the cats know. They saw that suitcase yesterday and the know something is up. timmy and Spinelli didn’t leave my side for most of the day yesterday. I had one or the other of them on my lap.

Anyway, Dave knocked and I opened the door and he said, “no lesson today”. Huh? I was looking forward to the last lesson, not really knowing what we woud do, but looking forward to it. I was hoping to get some audio of him too.

He said he was driving over here and could not think of anything for us to do. He said I’m done. I’m ready.

Wow.

We stood there talking for awhile and I’m not going to go into details because when I mentioned getting audio, he said it’s personal. And it is.

He was just very encouraging and reminded me of how far I’ve come.

I’m all emotional now because he’s right. I never in a million years expected to be where I am today. When I went blind I thought it was the end of the world and I was telling a good friend yesterday that I wouldn’t trade any of these experiences, any of the people, non of it, for my sight. Too many incredible things have happened.

So I think that’s why I’m so emotional today. I’m so filled with gratitude that it’s coming out in tears.

I’m getting melancholy too though, I can’t lie. I love my home, and it’s hard to leave it. My cats…oh here comes the sobbing. I’m so glad I’m typing this and not talking because my voice gets all high pitched when I try and talk through crying. I’m just gonna miss the cats sooooo much. I’ve never been away from home this long, ever. The longest was for ten days back in my choir days in high school. So it’s just really hard to leave home. I’m just going to miss the cats so much.

I can’t even get in to what I was going to write about today; a documentary on Captain Sully I watched last night. I was getting misty then, so there’s no way I can write about it while I’m already crying.

Ok, I think I’ve gotten enough down. Lish is coming over later so I can show her where the catfood and stuff is. Oh no, bring on more sobs. Ok I need to stop.

3 days! *sniff sniff *

16 Comments

Filed under cats, Doggy Countdown, Doggy Diaries, gratitude, misty eyes, Orientation and Mobility, Spinelli, Timmy

16 Responses to Doggy Countdown – Bittersweet

  1. Seriously, congratulations to you. You’re taking a huge step and you’ve worked hard for it. I’m glad to hear that some of those tears are coming from being proud of yourself, because you should be. You’ve accomplished so much and deserve to be proud. I don’t often say this about folks I’ve never met in person, but I’m proud of you too.

  2. WOW! Congrats are in order! That is so awesome, very emotional, but incredibly awesome. I miss my guys horribly every time I go away even though I know they are in good hands. You will get to school and be homesick but then Wed will come and dog day and you will start your new part of your life and it will be spectacular and amazing.

  3. Ro

    Oh enter the tears again haha! A big part of why I’m so emotional is just all the amazing people I know now because of this journey, and I count you as one of those people. You are like a big brother even though you’re younger lol, with your insights and experience and encouragement and I am so blessed to have you in my life. And it’s all because I’m getting a guide dog. Wow. It’s just a whirlwind of emotions today.

  4. Ro

    Oh my, I think I’m gonna well up with every comment I publish haha! You are so right that it will be so hard leaving the cats but when I get there it’s going to be so crazy I probably won’t have much time to think. And at least I’ll be surrounded by other furry friends, including my own partner. That will help to ease things, I’m sure. One thing is for sure, I couldn’t have gotten through all this without my Blogger family. I mean I would have gotten through it, but I’m so grateful to have your companionship and experience through all this. And to know I have a dog expert when I get back is such a good feeling hehe!

  5. hehe, yes you can ask any and all questions of me if you ever want.

  6. Aww. You’re making me all teary too. Darn kitties making it worse, kitties, do you know about guilt? You sure know how to bring it on!

    The time will pass before you know it…but of course you’ll only be able to say that after the fact.

    Steve said all the “you’re amazing” stuff, and I’ve said it before. But you are. You haven’t even been blind for two years, and just look at the heap of stuff you have accomplished! If we could turn that crazy determination into force, we could quite literally move mountains. I believe you are meant to do something amazing beyond anybody’s wildest dreams.

    Now don’t give yourself a cry headache. That happens to me if I’ve cried too long. I get all out of tears, but my head hurts.

  7. We’re all excited & proud of you too!

  8. Damn it, i posted this to check if it worked, and that i had the right links up for you, and the damn thing lost my comment!!!!!!!! What did i write? I wanna cry now too!!!!

    Awwww Ro, it’s prob natural to be all emotional. I was just thinking there about how proud you must feel.

    It will be hard for the first night, but you’ll be doing that much work that you won’t think about home that much.

    Back in November this year, i went to the hotel where i will train with my guidedog when i finally get matched (slightly different here). This was to get me used to the hotel before i get the dog so that i’m used to it and that i have one less thing to worry about. You can read those entries at the hotel,
    Here,
    Here,
    and
    Here
    I know those links work now lol.

    Once you meet people on your class, you will also forget about home.

    I hope you have a really good time, and can’t wait to see all those blog posts.

    Take care, and *hugs and kisses*. I’m not trying to make you cry any harder lol. Enjoy the flight, and take it easy for the next couple days. Xxxxxxxxxxo. Hopefully i won’t lose this comment this time!!!!

  9. L^2

    Awww… *hugs*
    In a few days you’ll have a new furry best friend to hug all you want while you’re away from the cats and when you get back home too. Insert will be a huge, but good, distraction from everything else for a while. And all of the hard work, tears, and fatigue will be totally worth it in the end.

  10. Ro

    Carin, still crying. It let up for awhile and then B got home so it started and then I forced myself to eat and was fine and then B just left to run his clothes to the laundry room and Timmy was whining like I’ve never heard him whine and then I got your comment and I have a bunch more emails so I don’t think it’s stopping anytime soon haha. How’s that for run on?

    And my head is pounding but there’s still more tears *weak grin*

  11. Awww! I agree with Carin. I can’t believe you’ve only been blind 2 years with all you know and have done… I had O and M for like… well a friggin long amount of years before I was confident enough to get a dog haha! (ok, so I’ve been blind all my life so that doesn’t really count, but still… lol) All you’ve occomplished in such a short amount of time is amazing! I wish I were as drivin as you! 🙂 hugs! Give your kitties hugs for me too… I love kitties! Soon you’ll have a doggy and kitties to hug! 🙂

  12. Ro

    Oh man I wanted to reply to every comment as they came in but I was deluged with tears with every one I read and I’m getting emails too.

    My friend and I were talking today about all the amazing people I’ve met through all this and I can’t even begin to describe how much you all mean to me, how much each of your words touch me so deeply. I’m moved almost beyond words. I think I just re-experienced the last almost two years all in about 12 hours. Wow. You are all so incredible, and I’m so glad I have you all during this journey!

    It’s almost like I traded my sight for the most amazing friends, and it is so, so worth it!

  13. Talk about making lemonade, Ro, you’re an inspiration and a blessing! 3 days, and you’re ready to rock!

  14. O wow. Congradulations in making this big step! Its going to be awesome once you feel that harness handle in your hand and leash. You have accomplished so much and I am very happy that you have done all of this within the short time you been blind!
    Keep up the good work. Your amazing!
    Hugs! Can’t wait to read about your pup. When do you leave again?

  15. Okay, I waited until today to post a comment because I thought maybe, just maybe the tears have stopped rolling. But I know they haven’t, you’re taking big strides in changing your life and all the people surrounding you are going to be affected. You have B, gamma, the kitties, and every other person’s life who’ve you touched on a daily basis.
    I can’t say, I’ll miss you, because I’m sure we’ll get updates and feel like we’re right there with you. *lucky us* I feel for the ones in your life that don’t read your blog and know the intimacies that you share here.
    We’re all luck to have a part of you with us and I’m sure I can speak for everyone when I say, “We’re PROUD of you!”
    Now you go get ’em!

    Stormcrow and I wish you all the best and we send prayers up for you!

    Luv ya Ro!
    *sob* *tears* *blow*
    All better… *smile*

    Jnoi

  16. Ro

    Well so far today I’ve stayed pretty dry haha. I still have that feeling like I could cry at any time, but so far it hasn’t been triggered. Got the good ol’ emotional hangover though ick!

    I think I’m glad for all the emotions yesterday because now I’m just excited! Only 2 more doggy countdown posts before I leave and today’s will be, interesting hehehe!

    Thanks everyone!!!

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