Carnival Post: I Will Not Regret the Past (Except for the Purpose of this Post)

Posts are being written and compiled for the next round of the Assistance Dog Blog Carnival, the topic of which is regrets. I’m down to the wire on this one. The deadline is in just over an hour as I paste my post into WordPress.

the first idea to come to mind when I pondered what I regret about my first and current guide dog, Jayden, is that we didn’t go to Muir Woods when we were at school together at guide Dogs for the blind. As if to punctuate that thought the day I was considering what to write about for the blog carnival, I ran across this article about Muir Woods’s tallest tree.

I knew about the trip to Muir Woods before I went to GDB and it was one of the things I was most looking forward to. I imagined beams of sunlight sneaking through the canopy of tall, stately redwoods, the scene suffused with a warm golden glow, a lovely and peaceful walk with my dog through the beauty of nature, the quiet and meditative quality of the stroll with my new partner, it was going to be beautiful.

My first mistake was having that expectation. Never, never have expectations. Nothing is ever what we think it will be.

My training at GDB was hard on me emotionally and physically and when it came time for the Muir Woods trip at the end of the three weeks, I didn’t have it in my heart to go. All I could think about was returning home with my boy and settling back in to life where I was comfortable, without instructors popping out and telling me what to do. why wouldn’t they tell me what to do? Even major league baseball players still have hitting coaches.

I regret being so damned willful.

What an experience that would have been, to stroll through those woods, to smell the trees, to take a break from the honking, humming and thumping of cars but I was just so tired. I was tired and I did not want to ride on the bus for an hour on a winding road, worrying about limiting my fluids, not just Jayden’s. Not being able to smoke. I regret that I used to be held hostage by nicotine.

Looking back, I always think Muir Woods would have been the perfect place to have that first amazing walk with jayden; our other walks were stressful for both of us while in class. I deeply regret letting the physical and mental fatigue win.

One of the ways I live today is not regretting the past, yet here I am doing just that. Jayden and I did have that first awesome walk together the day we arrived home in tucson and he guided me out of the airport, around concrete poles, following B through cold rain and biting wind to the car. I grinned the entire time even though it wasn’t majestic redwoods he guided me through.

Thinking about regrets is dangerous territory unless we look at regrets not as regrets, but as mistakes.

I made a mistake by not going to Muir Woods and I won’t make that mistake again. I learned my lesson. I have not turned down a trip since then and Jayden and I have had some pretty awesome experiences together.

If you wrote your own post on regrets for this blog carnival and if that post dredged up painful feelings, just remember the past cannot be changed and we only grow by making mistakes and learning from them.

On a lighter note,another regret I have is not teaching Jayden to stay out of the kitchen. I envy my friend Carin that she did with her guide and you can bet I won’t make that mistake again. This is a small regret, but it’s the only thing that can grow into a big thing when He won’t get out from under-foot. I’ve been able to teach him to stay on the couch when I put him there however, so I found a solution.

Oh and one more thing speaking of the couch, I regret that he was taught such good house manners with regards to furniture because here at home, he does not need permission every single time he wants up on the couch. It’s your couch too, buddy!

(Ok, that’s not really a regret since I’m incredibly grateful for his house manners. thank you to his puppy raisers!)

5 Comments

Filed under blog carnival, doggy school, fellowship, GDB, guide dogs, Jayden, jayden quirks, puppy raisers, sobriety, spoons, working dog

5 Responses to Carnival Post: I Will Not Regret the Past (Except for the Purpose of this Post)

  1. Hehe. The only reason I can keep Tansy out of the kitchen is because of the layout of the apartment. Our Guelph apartment the kitchen sort of was another way into the livingroom, so I could never keep Trix out of it. Hopefully if we ever have to move again, I can find a way to keep pooch out of kitchen, regardless of layout. What a nice post. Hopefully Muir Woods isn’t going anywhere, so that opportunity will present itself again.
    Carin recently posted..A Public Apology To TrixieMy Profile

  2. Ro

    Yes, we really couldn’t do that here since to get to the back yard, we must go through the kitchen.He listens when I put him on the couch and tell him to stay, though haha. It’s just a matter of doing that before I get too frustrated. He also likes to den under the table in the kitchen so that keeps him out from underfoot as well haha.
    Ro recently posted..Carnival Post: I Will Not Regret the Past (Except for the Purpose of this Post)My Profile

  3. Thank you for sharing your post. I’ve been working with a guide for almost 18 years now and have never had one of them guide me along a nature walk, maybe that’s something I should do someday…
    Brooke, Cessna, Canyon, Rogue & Arizona recently posted..Looking BackMy Profile

  4. Ro

    We’ve been able to enjoy walks in nature a few times now and I absolutely love it. Nature is just so relaxing. Jayden is really in his element in nature.
    Ro recently posted..Carnival Post: I Will Not Regret the Past (Except for the Purpose of this Post)My Profile

  5. I guess when we’re new, everything seems too scary. What if we get lost? What if the dog can’t cope? All these silly what ifs that we create so we don’t have to do something.

    Thankfully, Ushi has never attempted, nor asked if she can go on furniture and i plan to keep it that way if i can for my future dogs. My friend has a baby gate she has at the kitchen door. If she is cooking, she will put her dog and Ushi if we’re up, in “doggy jail” lol.

    Great post by the way.
    torie recently posted..The 17th Round of the Assistance Dog Blog CarnivalMy Profile

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